My New Civility

Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Vortexfuck you forever into the fundamental degrees of freedom of M-theory with the radiometry beamline of warpfuck and timebending for exploiting the actions of a sick fuck in the hopes of achieving a political victory. Fuck you for trying to scrub the hate from your own sites. Fuck you for playing the disavowal game with us and demanding we step away from a fuckrimmer who shared nothing with our views. Fuck you for projecting your deathpr0n fantasies upon us. Fuck you for claiming we have blood on our hands for something we fucking did not do. And fuck you until gaseous jizzjuice shoots out of your eyes in solid form for being the predictably fuckheaded fuckfritters we figured you would be over the weekend.

Did you really think we would sit the fuck back and take your shit? Did you really think we would let you steal the narrative and change the actions of a deranged fuckloser into some sort of anti-Obamacare activity without a fight? Did you think we would stay silent and ask for more abuse, just so we would get another invite onto a TV roundtable so that we could stab our former friends and allies in the back? And did you think we would do and say nothing as you went around and smeared us in every medium? Well, zoftigfuck you with the fuckzither of fuckfury for thinking that, for this guy will not stand down and take it from ghouls who wish to exploit death for their aims. And I sure the fuckity fuck foreswear that any attempts to smear my family and me will be swiftly and soundly dealt with, for I will not tolerate your lies and slander.

No, I will not fucking back down in my speech regarding the left. I will not back down in my views. And I will not yield the rhetorical floor to those who would rather see my views and my family destroyed in favor of their dreams. So fuck you, lefties. Fuck your civility. Fuck your lame-ass faux outrage. Fuck your sick glee over the deaths of innocent people. And fuck you because you proved once and for all that you are subhuman fuckwastoids from the fuckshuttle of low orbit freefucking with your actions this weekend.

So fuck you, lefties. I am thorugh dealing with you after this weekend. Go to hell, and get kamikazefucked with a stunt midget’s fuckhelmet for exposing who you really are and booting your fucking asses out in 2013.

Larry King Singing?

Larry King singing!

Fuck You, Ed Begley, Jr.

Fuck you, you stupid hippie dickbag.

Job Creation FAIL, Obama Edition

Yeah. Well nice fucking job, Captain Awesome.

Today’s Dose Of Enviro-FAIL

Fuck you, Prius owners.

I Love The German Beer Bike, And So Should You.

If you don’t love this invention, I don’t want to know you.

Courtesy Some German Dudes

If You Plan On Running Down The Street In Nothing But Your Underwear And A Bike Helmet

Why not go for the Gold Medal of Crazy?

Supt Hopkins said although the parade sounded amusing and probably looked the same way, it was incredibly dangerous at the time.

“He was running close to one of our main roads, where the big road trains travel,” Supt Hopkins said.

“It could have been quite tragic.”

Supt Hopkins said the man had not offered an explanation as to why he had attached the fire crackers to his head.

The 22-year-old Mt Isa man was charged with being a public nuisance and having possession of fireworks.

Cutting Torch+Excess Fuel Laying Around=Bad News

Especially for these Canadian guys.

Regional Police tell 570 News two men were trying to remove a rusty bolt on a gas tank with a cutting torch when fuel underneath the vehicle ignited. A bucket of fuel nearby was also set on fire.
It took crews 15 minutes to get the blaze under control. One man suffered minor burns while the other has second degree burns to his forehead, cheeks and arms.

If You Want To Paint Your House Strange Colors

This guy may be your mentor.

If You Want To Demonstrate Gun Safety

Don’t be like this guy.

The incident took place in the C-Block of Kabir Nagar near Maujpur in northeast Delhi. While going out for dinner on Thursday night, the victim, Kulbushan Tyagi, asked his wife Sangeeta (42) to hand him over his firearm. But when his wife and son objected to it, he tried to argue that there was nothing scary about a firearm. “Accordingly, he opened the magazine, took out the bullets and locked the firearm. He then pointed the gun at his wife and threatened to shoot her. Satisfied that he had sufficiently scared her, he then trained the gun on his son. He then suddenly placed the firearm near his eardrum and pulled the trigger, unaware that a bullet was still inside. He died instantly,” said a senior police officer.

The police, though, are not ruling out other possibilities as yet. “We are investigating whether the man was under debt or had any provocation to commit suicide. We have already recorded the initial statement of his wife in this regard,” said an investigating officer.

According to family members and neighbours of the deceased who did not wish to be named, Tyagi had been living in the area for the past 10 years. “A few days back, Tyagi had promised to take his two children, 15-year-old Reshmi and 12-year-old Rahul (names changed), out for a dinner once he could find some time for the outing from his busy schedule.”

Meanwhile, tension spread in the area after a section of the media reported that the son had allegedly shot at the father. Locals attacked television crew before the elderly brought the situation under control.