Jim Leyland Is Not A Happy Camper Right Now

Especially after this meltdown.

Warning! Bad Language!

Willie Randolph Is Feling The Stress Of Coaching In New York

And he is crying racism over it.

Under siege for his passive ways as the Mets struggled this season, Randolph suggested in an interview published Monday in the Bergen Record that racism might be fueling the animosity.

Randolph also criticized SNY in the interview, saying the network – whose majority owner is the Mets organization – intentionally feeds the perception he is too unemotional by not showing him interacting with players in the dugout.

Randolph addressed the racism angle first with reporters here yesterday morning, changing his story to say he was merely being “tongue in cheek” when talking with the Bergen reporter.

“I think I mentioned to him about it feeling almost racial or whatever, but that was pretty much . . . a tongue-in-cheek kind of reaction to what I’ve been feeling,” Randolph said. “That’s not to say anybody is racist or that this is racial. [The reporter] and I were just chit-chatting.”

If You Need To Open A Beer Bottle, But Lack An Opener

Try these options.
My favorite:

Hopefully you aren’t the type who walks around with your pants falling off your hips – which means you’re probably rocking a belt in the waist-land! Your belt’s buckle can also function as a bottle opener, and here’s how to do it.

* Take off your belt. You don’t want to try any sudden jerking motions with glass in that area of your body, do you?
* Fit an edge of the buckle tightly over the cap.
* Using your thumb, push hard up on the other edge of the buckle, which should pry the cap right off.
* Drink. And put your belt back on before your pants sag and you ruin the party for everyone.
* ‘Course if you’re slick, you can always ask the hottest chick to lend you hers. This way you’re closer to third base and your cold brew all in one shot.

If You Want To Claim That Chimps Need Human Rights Treatment

The European Courts wants to take that discussion up with you.

The legal wrangle began in February 2007, when the sanctuary where Matthew lives with another chimp, Rosi, plus a crocodile filed for bankruptcy protection.

Activists want to ensure the apes do not wind up homeless. Both were captured as babies in Sierra Leone in 1982 and smuggled to Austria for use in pharmaceutical experiments.

Customs officers intercepted the shipment and turned the chimps over to the shelter. Their upkeep costs £4,000 a month.

Donors have offered to help, but under Austrian law, only a human can receive personal gifts.

Organisers could set up a foundation to collect cash for Matthew, whose life expectancy in captivity is about 60 years.

But they argue that only personhood would ensure he is not sold to someone outside Austria, where he is protected by strict animal cruelty laws.

In dismissing the activists’ request to get a guardian for Matthew, a lower court ruled that the chimp was neither mentally impaired nor in danger – the legal grounds required for a guardian to be appointed.

It did not directly address the issue of whether a chimpanzee can be considered a person.

Eberhart Theuer, the animal rights group’s chief legal adviser, said there is a legal precedent to appoint a guardian for an individual incapable of expressing himself.

‘As long as Matthew is not recognised as a person, he could be sold abroad or killed for economic reasons,’ Theuer said.

‘His life depends on this decision. This case is about the fundamental question: Who is the bearer of human rights? Who is a person according to the European Human Rights Charter?’

A spokesman for the court in Strasbourg said: ‘Any application regarding this chimpanzee will be considered at a primary level by a magistrate and a lawyer before we decide whether it deserves a full-blown hearing.’

Look. I am all for protecting animals, and trying to help them when things don’t go their way. Hell, I blame the Euro Bureaucrats for putting up so many hurdles that prevent this lady from simply “adopting” the chimp in the same manner that I “adopted” my retired racing Greyhound. I hope she is able to take the chimp into her care, and I wish some sort of avenue was available for her to do so. But, granting Human Rights status to animals seems like a very slippery slope to me. What’s next? Not allowing dog owners to swat a dog on the nose when it has an accident in the house? Not allowing pet snakes to be fed mice because it might be “torture” to the mouse?

If You Try To Lift A Bulldozer With A Crane

Don’t be surprised when this happens.

from www.liveleak.com posted with vodpod

I Feel Like A Hamburger!

Man, Talk About Office Pranks!

Warning: Bad Language Alert!

If You Are Scheduled To Stand Trial For Naked Alligator Wrestling

Try not to get arrested again.

Apgar, 47, was being held at the Polk County Jail on Tuesday night with a bail set at $1,500.

He was originally charged with trespassing, exposure of sexual organs and breach of the peace in March when deputies found him scratched up, naked and wading toward an alligator in a pond at Saddle Creek Park in Lakeland.

If You Want To Win A Prize On The Radio

These guys have some advice on gimmicks that will work.

On Tuesday, Melanie Ramirez boarded a plane with her daughter for an all-expenses-paid trip to Los Angeles and tickets to the finals of “American Idol.”

All of it courtesy of a One-FM promotion with Fox 31 television.

This one took more than just a phone call, though. Ramirez had to outdo 14 other competitors, each performing fairly outrageous things for the tickets.

Ramirez’s shtick: She drank a helping of Dinuguan, a traditional Filipino soup made of pork blood.

Dude Didn’t Like The Fact His Wife Had A Tranny For A Driving Instructor

So much so, he sued the school.

But that wasn’t enough to satisfy one client who claimed he had been shortchanged when he booked a female instructor to teach his wife how to drive.

He phoned the Laugh ‘n’ Pass driving school threatening to sue after Miss Sherdley, 42, turned up for the lesson.

‘You have sent me a man. Send me a proper female. How dare you send a man with a deep voice,’ he told Joanne Dixon, who runs the school in West Yorkshire.

The man, a Muslim from the Meadowhall district of Sheffield who has not been named, claimed the company deliberately sent a man disguised as a woman.

‘His attitude and behaviour was outrageous and has upset me and Emma and everyone else who works here,’ Miss Dixon said.

‘We are not racist. We are not sexist-If anyone was being so it was that man.’

She said no other learners had complained about being taught by Miss Sherdley, an experienced instructor.