If You Want To See Charles Barkley Prove How Stupid He Is

You are in luck.

If A Grizzly Bear Attacks You

Here is what you need to do.

The younger Case said “after the bear pulled him back out and chomped on the back of his head, he thought he was going to die.”

His father wasn’t dead, but he pretended to be while the bear jumped up and down on him several times, then finally wandered off.

In spite of severe gashes on his head and upper arm, bites to his elbow and knee and bleeding profusely, he managed to drive his pickup truck about 25 kilometres out of the bush to a nearby settlement.

“I knew right away he’d been attacked by something,” said Rob Sandford who initially helped Case. “What I could see [he was] basically covered in blood.”

Case was rushed to hospital in Bella Coola and then airlifted to Vancouver General Hospital, where he remained yesterday.

Marvin Harrison Is In The News

And Captain Caveman tears a journalist a new one to explain the situation in context.

The only question that should be relevant is whether Marvin Harrison has broken a law. You don’t have to approve or disapprove of the Second Amendment to accept that it’s incorporated into American law. If Harrison owns the gun legally, that’s that. Why is a man — a guy who until this point has always gotten credit for being a class act and a quiet team player — now being accused (obliquely) of having the intent to murder police?

The Swedish Army Loves African Prostitutes

It appears as though the Swedish Army, while on peacekeeping missions in Africa, engaged in some hanky panky with the locals.

Thomas Häggström at the International Prosecution Authority said he could not could not comment on the specific allegations.

“Our initial priority will be to establish whether there is a real case at all,” he told The Local.

According to both Swedish law and international military regulations, it is a serious and punishable offence for military staff to procure sexual services.

If You Want To Skin A Deer Head In Front Of Schoolchildren

This guy can show you how.

Apparently he laid down the deer’s head on a tree stump and started to flay it in full view of the staff and young children. When school staff asked him to leave, the man became very unpleasant and the police were called.

However, police did not make it in time and the man had already taken off, leaving open-mouthed pre-schoolers and their teachers in his wake.

If You Want To Know How SAAB Tests Their Cars

Now you know.

“For certain things, it’s important to use cadavers. [The tests] involved people who had donated their own bodies,” Tingvall told Expressen.

He explained that the bodies were used in experiments meant aid further development of crash test dummies and investigate the injuries sustained by human bodies in car accidents.

According to Tingvall, a total of ten cadavers were used in the GM project, and that Saab automobiles were likely involved an account of the brand’s association with safety.

“It’s a part of the [GM] family where everyone partakes in the research results,” he told the newspaper.

Neither GM or Saab acknowledged any tests involved dead human bodies.

The EU Proves How Feckless They Are, Vol. 237,873,098,812

Especially when it comes to aid for Burmese Cyclone Victims.

“We put the accent on the diplomatic efforts to convince the Burmese authorities that the best way to assist the population is to allow humanitarian organisations to work independently.”

The spokesman said diplomatic pressure was being exerted by the main international donors, led by the United Nations. [That oughta work. And I'll become King Of England as well-ed.]

 

If You Want To Impeach The Attorney General Of Ohio

Guess who you need to contact to see if that is feasible?

Husted said Wednesday the House isn’t equipped to investigate whether Dann has committed any impeachable offenses. He says it would be helpful if Dann appointed an independent investigator to review all the information from the scandal.

Dann, the state’s top attorney, admitted an extramarital affair with an employee that he said contributed to an atmosphere in his office that led to sexual harassment claims against an aide.

Ahhh…politics!

Rick Ankiel Is Pretty Good

Feel Safe Flying?

Maybe after this deal, not so much.

A homeless man managed to sneak onto a plane on Wednesday morning.

The man slipped past security guards at a perimeter check point while guards were inspecting a vehicle.

He was found sleeping on a regional jet that was being worked on.