Amy Winehouse Is Having Fun

And she looks marvelous.

It was a new low for Amy who was reportedly high on Class A drugs, and was seen in the streets of Camden looking wild-eyed, confused and unsteady on her feet following a six-hour pub crawl.

After playing pool, Amy returned to her flat, but emerged to visit nearby Bar Tok at 2am.

A source told The Sun: “She was off her face, throwing drinks around and turning over tables.

“Amy screamed, ‘I am a legend, get these people out. I want to take drugs.”

The dishevelled and thin star then reportedly kissed her mystery friend before leaving at 2.45am.

A good samaritan then tried to get her a cab, but she reportedly thought he was trying to molest her and allegedly headbutted him in the face.

The alleged victim went to police yesterday and reported his claim, sparking the police probe. Sources told The Sun that Amy will be arrested.

If You Chop Tulips With An Umbrella

The Japanese police want to talk to you.

Police have launched a search for the man, who appears to be aged between his 40s and 50s.

The suspect, dressed in a suit and tie, was captured swinging his umbrella violently to lop the tops off tulips in planters near the Gunma Prefectural Government headquarters in Maebashi late on April 18.

If You Try To Steal Money From A Gas Station Vacuum Cleaner

Try to do better than these guys.

The crime was caught on surveillance cameras. The video shows two men pulling up in a maroon pick up truck, tying the vacuum cleaner to the truck and taking off, dragging the vacuum cleaner on the ground.

The theft even surprised Detective James Edgar with the Putnam County Sheriff’s Office.

Edgar said “You can see when the truck pulled it up, the vacuum was still energized. So you can see the sparks, and I’m like– holy cow!”

Three minutes after the first vacuum heist, the video shows the thieves coming back for the second vacuum cleaner. Again, they chained it to the maroon truck, ripped it up out of the ground, and drug it behind the truck.

Nancy Pelosi Knows The Bible

Ummm…..not so much.

In her April 22 Earth Day news release, Pelosi said, “The Bible tells us in the Old Testament, ‘To minister to the needs of God’s creation is an act of worship. To ignore those needs is to dishonor the God who made us.’ On this Earth Day, and every day, let us pledge to our children, and our children’s children, that they will have clean air to breathe, clean water to drink, and the opportunity to experience the wonders of nature.”

Cybercast News Service repeatedly queried the speaker’s office for two days to determine where the alleged Bible quote is found. Thus far, no one has responded.

Distinguished biblical scholars, however, cast doubt on the existence of the passage.

John J. Collins, the Holmes professor of Old Testament criticism and interpretation at Yale Divinity School, said he is totally unfamiliar with Pelosi’s quotation.

“(It’s) not one that I recognize,” Collins told Cybercast News Service. “I assume that she means this is a paraphrase. But it wouldn’t be a close paraphrase to anything I know of.”

Claude Mariottini, a professor of Old Testament at Northern Baptist Theological Seminary, told Cybercast News Service the passage not only doesn’t exist – it’s “fictional.”

“It is not in the Bible,” Mariottini said. “There is nothing that even approximates that.”

And Ace has some excellent analysis.

If You Think Your Boyfriend Was In A Pr0n Movie You Were Watching

Don’t do what this lady did.

The victim says it all started when he and his girlfriend were inside his southwest Albuquerque home watching a pornographic move at 10:30 Wednesday morning.

That’s when the victim called 911 saying his girlfriend, 20-year-old Amanda Montoya, had a knife.

“She almost shanked me and everything. She put the (expletive) knife right under my throat,” the victim told a 911 operator.

The victim, wearing only a pair of shorts took off down Five Points, begging the 911 dispatcher for help.

He said Moya had already stabbed him in the face and bitten him on his chest.

If You Want To See A Guy Eat Three Pounds Of Fried Asparagus In Three Minutes

Your wait is over.
And here is what this guy has to say:

The contest takes place April 26th at the Stockton Asparagus Festival. I currently hold the record for deep fried asparagus, 8.6 pounds in 10 minutes. This year, my biggest competition will come from Pat Bertoletti.

Oh, and go see the video. Just do it.

If You Want To See A Moron Crash His Bike And Get Hurt

Here you go.

from www.break.com posted with vodpod

Remember Terrell Owens’ Latest Escapades?

Well, it seems his lawyers are getting into the fray.

TMZ obtained a cease and desist letter sent to folks at TheDirty.com explaining that Terrell unknowingly walked into the sticky situation. Team Terrell is also demanding the website take down the shots and “state to the public that these photographs linking Mr. Owens to porn were not done with his consent.” The photo was removed from the porno site, but TheDirty has yet to follow suit.

Gotta love South Beach … where you can accidentally walk into a porn shoot.

If You Were Wondering If Sweden Is Considering What Advertisements Will Be Allowed

Worry no more.

In a statement announcing the decision, the government cited concerns that the proposal conflicted with freedom of speech and freedom of the press.

“I don’t want to infringe on fundamental human freedoms and rights for a legislation the efficacy of which I question. This is not the way to win the fight for gender equity,” said Gender Equity Minister Nyamko Sabuni in a statement.

The suggested ban was presented in January as part of a report from an investigation into the prevalence of sexist advertising commissioned by the previous Social Democrat-led government.

In the report, special government rapporteur Eva-Maria Svensson suggested the creation of a law “banning advertising containing sexist content.”

Ahhh….the Nanny State at its finest.

The American Nanny Staters Are Trying To Limit The Troops’ Access To Entertainment

Namely, girlie mags. And Ace nails them.
Why can’t these do-gooders worry about something more important, like stopping zombies?