Formula 1 Racing Is Fun And Safe

If You Want To See A Fearless Animal

Here it is.

If You WantTo Know What Happens To Foul-Mouthed Parrots

It seems they are banned from mingling with other birds.

“It sounds like a builders’ yard, with all the abuse flying about.”

Barney, a seven-year-old blue and gold macaw, apparently picked up his choice vocabulary from his previous owner.

He has duly passed it on to African Greys Sam and Charlie, both five years old, with whom he shares a cage in Mr Grewcock’s living room.

Their favourite words are f*** off, b******* and t***.

Mr Grewcock, who owns the Warwickshire Wildlife Sanctuary in Nuneaton, said: “They just sit there swearing at each other now.

“I wouldn’t mind, but we had been careful of what we said in front of the other birds so they didn’t go like Barney.

“I didn’t think they would pick it up from him. We have got another African Grey called Sunny who squawks ’shut up’ at them when the swearing starts – but they don’t take any notice.”

If You Were Afraid That Today’s Fat Children Would Hurt A Donkey

Your fears are allayed, as the Nanny State swoops in to save the day.

A donkey code of practice is being brought in to stop anyone over 50.8kg (8st) from riding the animals amid growing fears that Britain’s 850 donkeys are buckling under the weight of heavier children and putting their health at risk.

As childhood obesity becomes an increasing problem, a whole generation could miss out on what has become something of a rite of passage at Britain’s seaside resorts.

The latest rules, drawn up by the Donkey Sanctuary in Devon and endorsed by the British Equine Veterinary Association, are targeted at all local authorities with beach donkeys – including Great Yarmouth, Brighton and Torquay.

Blackpool beach, which is home to the largest number of beach donkeys in the UK, is likely to see the biggest impact on its 200 animals.

The resort was approached by the charity to accept the first copy of the new code to hand over to the town’s mayor, Councillor Robert Wayne, and Joan Humble, the Labour MP for Blackpool North and Fleetwood, at the north pier today.

If You Thought Your Wedding Was Wild

Try to top this one.

When police had to return a second time to the home Saturday night, officers stunned both the groom and his cousin with a Taser when they both became aggressive towards the officers.

The groom and cousin were arrested for allegedly resisting arrest.

The bride was taken into custody on suspicion of public intoxication.

If You Want A Reason To Keep Termites Away

Consider what they did to this guy’s life savings.

He started using the safe box in September 2005.

He says when he opened it on 29 January, there was nothing in the safe except termite dust and remains of currency notes and that his investment papers were “badly perforated”.

The white ants did not even spare the ornaments and their sheen has vanished, he says.

“I wrote to the head office of the Central Bank of India and the regional offices of the Reserve Bank of India,” Mr Prasad says. “Even after two months, I’m waiting for a response from them.”

Oops.

If You Want To See Somebody Get All Worked Up Over Nothing

This story is the prime example.

Students at Pineview Elementary in Reedsburg had been dressing in costume all last week as part of an annual school tradition called Wacky Week. On Friday, students were encouraged to dress either as senior citizens or as members of the opposite sex.

A local resident informed the Voice of Christian Youth America on Friday. The Milwaukee-based radio network responded by interrupting its morning programming for a special broadcast that aired on nine radio stations throughout Wisconsin. The broadcast criticized the dress-up day and accused the district of promoting alternative lifestyles.