Hideki Matsui Is Getting Married

And he revealed she is a civilian.

If You Think Healthy Living Will Kill You

Willie Nelson will agree with you.

He recalls, “I just got into running – first time in I don’t know how long. Then I hit the water and swam. My left lung completely collapsed. I instinctively knew what had happened and was far enough offshore to get a little concerned.”

And Nelson still shudders when he remembers the pain that was to come as medics attempted to fix his smashed lung.

Today’s Hawk Flies Off With Small, Yappy Dog Story

Brought to you by Florida.

The manager at the Pet Lodge said the dog was left in a fenced back yard for only a couple of minutes by a dog walker.

When the dog walker returned, May was gone.

The employees at the business said with high fences, no holes in the yard and no outside access, there is only one explanation — one of the hawks in the area carried the dog off.

“I don’t doubt it because we are in Florida,” the dog’s owner, Deanne Gusler, said. “But in my opinion, if they know there is a chance a hawk will swoop down and get my dog, they need to be down there watching her.”

The owner of the Pet Lodge said he plans put mesh wire across the top of the back yard fences to protect the dogs from large birds.

If You Wonder What Goes On At Detroit Tigers Baseball Games

Now you know.

The man, who up until last year was in charge of the scoreboard and selecting and recording crowd shots, Scott Fearncombe, said Wednesday any such reports “were never brought to my attention, and I don’t know of any secret stash of videos.”

Up-skirt shots would have been technically difficult from the dugout-level cameras, he said, “because of the way people are sitting and the angle of the cameras.”

Videographers running those two cameras and two in the upper deck fed constant streams of crowd shots to Fearncombe’s monitors as he was operating Comerica Park’s scoreboard, the largest in baseball when the park opened in 2000. Recording any of the feeds to DVD was a matter only of hitting a few buttons, Fearncombe said, but nothing inappropriate was recorded to his knowledge.

College Football Is Clean And Pure

Looks as though Clemson Football may have some explaining to do for their star recruit taking this photo.

If You Want To See A Killer Soccer Commercial From Europe

This guy found one.

More Bruce Pearl Photos

Courtesy of this guy.

If You Want To See A Tortoise Smoke A Cigarette

Just talk to this guy.

One day, Mr Yun teased the tortoise by putting a cigarette butt into its mouth, and to his surprise it started to smoke it, according to the news agency.

From then on, he shared his cigarettes with his pet, Xinhua said.

“It seems to have become addicted,” Mr Yun was quoted as saying.

“Whenever I smoke in front of it, it will stick its head out of the water and fidget about until I give it the stub.”

Mr Yun proved his claim by putting a cigarette in the tortoise’s mouth in front the paper’s reporter and his neighbours, Xinhua quoted the newspaper as saying.

To everyone’s surprise, the tortoise finished it in less than four minutes, the news agency said.

If You Own A Pet In Sweden

The Nanny State can now regulate how you raise it.

Pets kept indoors should be within view of a window allowing sunlight, and dogs kept outdoors should have access to both sunny and shaded areas, as well as protection against wind and rain.

Levels of ammonia and carbon dioxide in the air must also be kept below 10 parts per million and 3000 parts per million, respectively.

In addition to regulating individual pet owners, the rules also extend to “doggie daycares” which are required to ensure that dogs which can’t get along with one another can be separated in order to “avoid conflicts.”

Officials hope the new set of rules will make it easier for animal inspection authorities who investigate cases of animal cruelty.

“Previously, inspectors had no regulatory support to which they could refer. It’s hard to convince owners to change their behavior without having something that specifies what is acceptable and what isn’t,” said Jones Fur.

Look, I’m all for protecting animals from cruelty and abuse. And abusers should be punished harshly; however, I just wonder how far of a leap it will be between The Man regulating how much ammonia is in the air and how much fatty food we are allowed to feed a dog before we get arrested.

Site Update

Thanks to the efforts and assistance of Conservative Belle, Doubleplusundead, and S. Weasel (the creator, I think, of the picture I stole and pasted below), to name a few, a Moron Blogroll us up and running. You will notice the Blogroll on the right side of the site.

So far, WordPress has had difficulty processing the blogroll in any format other than in RSS format. As a result, you will notice a revolving list of sites every time you visit.